2 May 2008

Ini Aku

Hey, Hasanah!
You've gone crazy.
Why did you cry like a little kid..???
Why you cannot stop huh..??
Even you cry, the pain won't stop either,
Everyday everytime they will follow you...

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Yesterday...

Ortho specialist: "sabar la hasanah..."
Owh, what I've said? I just asking few questions.
I am about to say; "Da 6 tahun saye sabar, why can't sabar untuk 6 tahun lagi?"
Doctor, it was your mistake 5 years ago.......

Medical specialist said: "sementara next TCA, jumpa psychiatrist dulu eh."
I am about to say; "I dont need any."


WHat I need most is..
the pain to be heal, all of them, all parts...all...all....all....
6 years..nothing's getting better, yet it worsen..
Adding up with new pain...year to year..

WHen it gonna stop..
just in my dream..
Heh, did I have any dream of recovering either...??
I dont think so.......
My mistake..???

I must be going nuts for writing this such post..
Heh, am I??
WHy...
this is so not like me..
me who really hide my true self from others...


hypocrite..??
No, it is to behave......
Im not as tough as what others thought


lalalalalala...Im giving up

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I guess I'll never understand what you are going through... Coz only HE knows...

But to hear that you are giving up... that can't be true...

HE chooses you for a reason...
I myself could never dare to imagine being in your place...

Just like it says... "You can't achieve stregth just by waiting, it must be built"

Think positive! Don't let it eat you.

Built that stregth bit by bit.

NMZ said...

thank you very much

it's already six years of bulding up the strength..
SIX years...
A person may go as a very tough person everyday everytime, and in front of others, but instead, there's certain times where people will fall down the stream..
There's always be..falling down terribly..there will always be..
That's human nature..
Even by times, it's eating me up..lil by lil.

Even our faith has it fall and rise..

agree with me..??

ikhsan1007 said...

i'll hav to agree that it takes supreme courage to face d problems 4 six years up till now..most people wud've given up by then..

but then again, u did went thru all that rite??so it goes to show that if u still hav d faith in Him n fight all d probs that u're facing, then InsyaAllah, He'll giv u the strength 2 make ur days shine bright again..

ya ukhti,u'll always hav Him by ur side..so juz smile n b positive..u'll make it thru one day, i noe u will..:)